Update #5

Further Adventures in Domestication

Now that 99% of my unpacking is complete and the new homeowner duties taper off, I find myself in the same predicament I was in before I moved, I have to feed myself when I get home. In pursuit of this lofty, difficult goal, I went back to my local Food Giant (which is two blocks away). No more Sedanos for me! This time my main target was side dishes. I picked up some spinach, instant potatoes & au-gratin garlic potatoes. The au-gratin garlic potatoes are for later, they require the use of the oven. Currently the oven and I have an uneasy truce. She knows that I am her owner but we have an unspoken agreement: for the time being, she keeps to her self and I stick to the range. No one gets hurt. However, recent relations have deteriorated since I believe she saw me pull out from a Target bag...a pair of oven mitts.

So I decided to cook up a steak, have a side of spinach and make some instant mashed potatoes. I had done this before so I felt up to the challenge. It was tough but I made it without serious injury. Unfortunately, I had bought a new brand of instant potato. I read the instructions and they seemed simple enough, open a packet, add water, add milk, add butter, boil water, stir. Voila, mashed potatoes!!

Guess what? It's not THAT easy. As I prepare to make my feast, I put the water, milk, butter to boil. I see that there are only two packets in the bag. Upon reading the fine print, I see that one packet SERVES FOUR!!! As luck would have it, I have a measuring cup but it starts at 1/4 cup. I estimate what 1/4 of 1 1/2 cups water is, 1/4 of 1/2 cup milk and put it in the saucepan. As I mess around with the steak, getting it ready for consumption, the mixture starts to boil over. I lift it from the heat and then...I forgot to measure the potato mixture, I now try to immediately figure out what 1/4 of 1 3/4 cups is. Do you remember how to do that? I did but I'm rusty and stuff was burning. Well, let me tell you, figuring out the least common denominator, converting a whole number to a fraction, multiplying by a reciprocal and then simplifying isn't as easy as it sounds when you're under pressure...

The mashed potatoes were edible, but they ended up with a consistency not unlike spackle.

Laundry

It was time I try my hand at doing my own laundry. I had been lulled into complacency by having a little Cuban laundry near my apartment that would wash & fold clothes for a pittance. Now that I had 4 washers & dryers at my disposal, it was time to forge a new path.

Jeanne taught me that clothes actually has instructions! They have this little tab of paper that lets you know what temperature you wash & dry the item in! That's pretty neat. What will they think of next?

I played it safe and armed with my new knowledge, decided to try my luck with washing my work pants. The washing went ok, I put them all in cold water with detergent. Apparently, Louise doesn't have many friends here. I made Louise's acquaintance in the laundry room. She's an elderly lady that whose hobby seems to be wandering aimlessly around the condo complex. She wandered into the laundry room and began to tell me the history of North Bay Village. She has been living in this complex for over 20 years. She also really doesn't like the handicapped neighbor in my floor. And finally, she excused herself for not looking at me while she was speaking to me. She said she was not feeling well. uhhh ok. 3 minutes later she tells me she's about to pass out. Nice, some more excitement tonight. She says that she has been passing out for the past year and she feels it coming on again. She's going to have open heart surgery in 2 days and her heart's the cause of her fainting. I tell her, "Why don't you go rest in your unit?" She says, "No, it's not necessary. I won't be around for much longer." Now, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO REPLY TO THAT?!?!?!? I strategically began to busy myself with moving my clothes from the washer to the dryer. She stumbled off. Since I didn't hear a thud or see a body as I left the laundry room, I can only assume she made it up to the third floor. I'll keep an eye out for her in the next couple of days but there may be an extra parking space opening up soon. Feel free to visit.

I then took the next step and tried to iron my pants. That was true test. I figured out how to make the ironing board open and get the iron on. What I couldn't quite figure out was how to get the wrinkles out of the pants with the iron. I passed the iron over the pants but the wrinkles were still there. I then figured out that the pants have to be COMPLETELY flat, or you end up creating these nice pleats where you didn't want them.

Ironing Tip #1
If you're ironing and the iron & board tip over, don't try to save the iron from falling, just let it go, trust me, let it go.

It ended up pretty well, I only ruined one pair of pants and suffered a burnt fingertip.

There's a Better World Out There

And finally, I get a very interesting letter from GEICO telling me that since I moved away from Hialeah, my insurance premium went DOWN by $220 per year. Wow, there's life...dare I say it, a BETTER & CHEAPER life...outside of Hialeah?!?!?!?

Until next time...